Tragedy strikes. Two weeks ago a three year old girl named Shula Swerdlov was run over by a careless driver. This accident brought up intense fear in me about bringing a child into this dangerous world. How could we possibly protect those we love from things beyond our control?
Within the Jewish framework, when there is a death, very specific laws apply. The process is called Shiva. For the first seven days the entire community comes to visit and sit with those grieving. It’s as if when there is a unity, the loss and the pain thereof is somehow dispersed among those present. Shloshim is the Hebrew word for 30. After 30 days have passed since death, there is another plateau of slightly lesser intensity. There is a custom to publicly mark that event by a gathering of brief duration, devoted to the “Three pillars upon which the world stands”: Torah study, Prayer, & Charity. The Schwartz family held this memorial service on November 17th, 2009. May her sweet soul be elevated, and all the countless good deeds of your unbelievably special family carry her gently into the next world. May our prayers go up for the healing of the pain your family is going through.
Death happens to us all sooner or later. This is part of the cycle of life. It often feels senseless, terrible and so awfully sad. There is nothing we can do. The reality of our helplessness could send us into deep depression. Rambam, one of the greatest Jewish sages, says in his Guide to the Perplexed - “the sole object of all trials…is to teach man what he ought to do…so that the event which forms the actual trial is not the end desired; it is but an example for our instruction and guidance.”
I remember when my brother was in a very serious car accident a few years ago. Standing useless at his hospital bed, watching him suffer, moaning and struggling despite elephantic doses of sedatives, tubes attached to his throat and lungs and genitals, bandages and stitches all over. These were, without a doubt, the most painful moments of my life…knowing the suffering of a loved one and being absolutely helpless.
It does not make sense that we are created in this world to suffer. It could not be that individuals are given tests that they simply do not have the potential or strength to overcome. We must make peace with the knowledge that we do not see the full picture. The way H-shem runs the world and how things really work in the Infinite is beyond the mind of man to comprehend.
We do however know the legacy of the Jewish nation. We submit our will to His. During the Akeidah, (the binding of Isaac) Avraham was willing to sacrifice not only his beloved son, but also everything he held dear about himself as a person - his values, dreams and beliefs to follow the commandment of G-d. Throughout our history, as individuals and as a people we have burned in the fires of tribulations and triumphs in order to cleave to the Torah as G-d’s expressed Will for us in this world.
There is an idea from our Torah, that when Adam & Eve ate from the tree, they changed the way the world works. Up until that point, the choice between good and evil was more distinct and was equally weighted. After they chose to go against G-d’s Will, the body became the dominant over spirit. There has been a further progression since then. We live in physical worlds, with physical bodies, relying on physical activities such as sleeping, eating and breathing for our survival. How then is it possible for us to achieve our purpose of allowing our neshama (soul) to direct our physical desires that run after worldly pleasures? Is it possible that G-d would create a system where we could only fail?
So, the Ramchal teaches that after the sin, this system had an integral change. Previously only through spiritual means such as meditation and prayer, which we all know are lofty and often hard to attain, our striving for illumination could be achieved. After the chet (sin), G-d gave humanity the potential to illuminate the physical not only through spiritual means but also through doing physical actions. These are called the mitzvahs or commandments. When we light Shabbat candles, or eat a kosher meal, give charity or do a kindness for someone we change our physical makeup. We may not register this subtle change but it’s a physical change that happens. This means that we can go through life illuminating our physicality through everyday living.
This is all we can do. Move through our lives doing as much as we can to bring G-dliness to ourselves and the rest of the world. Not just through our spiritual aspirations and learning but through our everyday interactions with people and everything we come across. Each one of us is a vessel to bring truth, love and light into this world. Even and especially in the most difficult moments…
Within the Jewish framework, when there is a death, very specific laws apply. The process is called Shiva. For the first seven days the entire community comes to visit and sit with those grieving. It’s as if when there is a unity, the loss and the pain thereof is somehow dispersed among those present. Shloshim is the Hebrew word for 30. After 30 days have passed since death, there is another plateau of slightly lesser intensity. There is a custom to publicly mark that event by a gathering of brief duration, devoted to the “Three pillars upon which the world stands”: Torah study, Prayer, & Charity. The Schwartz family held this memorial service on November 17th, 2009. May her sweet soul be elevated, and all the countless good deeds of your unbelievably special family carry her gently into the next world. May our prayers go up for the healing of the pain your family is going through.
Death happens to us all sooner or later. This is part of the cycle of life. It often feels senseless, terrible and so awfully sad. There is nothing we can do. The reality of our helplessness could send us into deep depression. Rambam, one of the greatest Jewish sages, says in his Guide to the Perplexed - “the sole object of all trials…is to teach man what he ought to do…so that the event which forms the actual trial is not the end desired; it is but an example for our instruction and guidance.”
I remember when my brother was in a very serious car accident a few years ago. Standing useless at his hospital bed, watching him suffer, moaning and struggling despite elephantic doses of sedatives, tubes attached to his throat and lungs and genitals, bandages and stitches all over. These were, without a doubt, the most painful moments of my life…knowing the suffering of a loved one and being absolutely helpless.
It does not make sense that we are created in this world to suffer. It could not be that individuals are given tests that they simply do not have the potential or strength to overcome. We must make peace with the knowledge that we do not see the full picture. The way H-shem runs the world and how things really work in the Infinite is beyond the mind of man to comprehend.
We do however know the legacy of the Jewish nation. We submit our will to His. During the Akeidah, (the binding of Isaac) Avraham was willing to sacrifice not only his beloved son, but also everything he held dear about himself as a person - his values, dreams and beliefs to follow the commandment of G-d. Throughout our history, as individuals and as a people we have burned in the fires of tribulations and triumphs in order to cleave to the Torah as G-d’s expressed Will for us in this world.
There is an idea from our Torah, that when Adam & Eve ate from the tree, they changed the way the world works. Up until that point, the choice between good and evil was more distinct and was equally weighted. After they chose to go against G-d’s Will, the body became the dominant over spirit. There has been a further progression since then. We live in physical worlds, with physical bodies, relying on physical activities such as sleeping, eating and breathing for our survival. How then is it possible for us to achieve our purpose of allowing our neshama (soul) to direct our physical desires that run after worldly pleasures? Is it possible that G-d would create a system where we could only fail?
So, the Ramchal teaches that after the sin, this system had an integral change. Previously only through spiritual means such as meditation and prayer, which we all know are lofty and often hard to attain, our striving for illumination could be achieved. After the chet (sin), G-d gave humanity the potential to illuminate the physical not only through spiritual means but also through doing physical actions. These are called the mitzvahs or commandments. When we light Shabbat candles, or eat a kosher meal, give charity or do a kindness for someone we change our physical makeup. We may not register this subtle change but it’s a physical change that happens. This means that we can go through life illuminating our physicality through everyday living.
This is all we can do. Move through our lives doing as much as we can to bring G-dliness to ourselves and the rest of the world. Not just through our spiritual aspirations and learning but through our everyday interactions with people and everything we come across. Each one of us is a vessel to bring truth, love and light into this world. Even and especially in the most difficult moments…
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